SuperGirlWorkout Blog

Forgiveness, Part II

by Lynn DeVasto on 04/12/13

Continuing on the journey of forgivenesss...For the person giving it, please know...forgiveness does not mean that you are stupid, or that you are letting somebody continue to hurt you. You are allowed to set up boundaries, you are allowed to ease back into that relationship, you are allowed to do whatever you need to do to feel comfortable without hurting the other person in return. It means that you are a loving person, who is also willing to work on yourself as well as that relationship.

For the person withholding it, please know...the person that is asking forgiveness, they cannot feel worse about themselves than they already do. There is no need go reduce their lives to a litany of what they have done. They already know this. This is the reason they are asking for your forgiveness. Please give them credit for asking, it is incredibly humbling for them to do so, and not at all easy. If you aren't ready, you can say you're not ready. This doesn't mean there can be no relationship. I would ask you, though, why are you holding onto it? The feelings of anger, resentment and hurt damage you much more than anybody else. I would also ask you, where would you be if every time you hurt another (whether they were aware of it or not), it was held against you?

As we all know, forgiveness can be tough on everybody. We have all been on both sides of the fence at different times in our lives. Think how good our lives would be if we could ask for it when necessary, and give it freely when needed. What could your relationships look like if you truly incorporated that one word? I'm thinking love and acceptance all around.

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Forgiveness, Part I:

by Lynn DeVasto on 04/08/13

Forgiveness, Part I: For the Person Seeking Forgiveness

I am spending some time pondering forgiveness this week. Forgiveness itself is so deeply personal, and it doesn't seem to matter if we are the person who is giving, withholding or receiving..one thing remains constant. It is incredibly difficult and needs to be done in layers.

For the person receiving it (or asking to receive it), please know...you are allowed to ask for it. You are allowed to forgive yourself first. You are allowed to carry on with your life, having learned a better way. When you know better, you do better. You are allowed to do this even if the other person doesn't have the capacity to forgive you. Please don't feel entitled to forgiveness, sometimes it can't come in our timeframe, if at all. If this is the case, send them blessings and continue to move on and grow in your own life.

Above all else, please forgive yourself. We often hold onto our lack of self-forgiveness through addictions. Drugs, alcohol, gambling, food, shopping, etc. We all make mistakes in life...sometimes we can make a doozy of a mistake. Personally, I have made some of the dooziest ones. Seek the help you need, in whatever way resonates with you. Psychologists, life coaches, support groups, whatever you need, just take that step. Be gentle with yourself as you walk though this life.

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Spring Into Fitness

by Lynn DeVasto on 03/21/13

Ahh, spring is here! If only the weather agreed with the calendar (I saw snow this morning!). Pretty soon, though, we'll be coming out of hibernation and away from our big coats and bulky sweaters. Aack!!

I took the plunge today and took a hot yoga class. I have been wanting to for over a decade now! Really? What took me so long? Generally it was my perfectionist mentality that held me back...I decided that I would need to do a class every day for a month to get the benefits (somewhere I heard that), I didn't think I was flexible enough, I felt foolish, I thought I may pass out. My list of excuses is as long as anybody else's! I will tell you that I now feel accomplished and strong, along with a sense of relief that something I had been dreading for so long was actually quite amazing!

What is it that you have wanted to do for your body for so long? Why have you put it off? Are you afraid? Do you feel that you are not worth it? What can you do to take a small step in that direction? I am a BIG fan of small, non-threatening steps and would love to hear what you want to do and how you're going to make that happen!

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Past your comfort zone...

by Lynn DeVasto on 03/14/13

This week, I left my full time job.

This was my business that I had worked in for 15 years, and I had worked my way from the ground up. There were a lot of reasons to stay...I had invested a lot of time and money, I adored my clients and the stock market was rebounding. This career had served me well and allowed me to raise my son in a respectable manner. The problem was, I was no longer fulfilled and this career no longer spoke to me in the way it once did. The industry had changed and more importantly, so had I. Still, I held onto my job as though it was my identity. I felt that if I left, I wouldn't know who I was. So I stayed past the point of personal fulfillment and past the point where it was still serving me or my clients. It was the right time for me to let go, and still, I had a very difficult time doing so.

It makes me think...what else do we hold onto that no longer serves us? What doesn't fit who we are anymore? Clothes? Furnishings and decor? People? How we act in certain relationships? Feelings? What do we want to give up in order to more fully become who we are meant to be?

I would love to hear your thoughts!

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What happened to our New Year's Resolutions?

by Lynn DeVasto on 05/24/12

Oh. My. Gosh. We are already at the unofficial start of summer!!

How are your New Year's Resolutions going? Pretty soon, we'll be halfway through the year, and I always like to take stock and see how I've done so far. So, let's see: I did do a 3 week cleanse, and I did give up meat for 6 weeks during Lent. But...my home still isn't spotless and clean each and every day no matter what, and I sure didn't keep up with journalling 3 pages each and every day. Sometimes, I wonder why we write these things down when we know darn well we probably won't do them. So, WHY do we do that?

I'll tell you why, and it's not to torture ourselves! We do it because our resolutions, our affirmations, our intentions, they represent the highest versions of ourselves. One day, when we're ready, we will accomplish them. It may not be this year, or perhaps not the first half of this year, BUT, the year isn't even halfway over. Can I start journalling again? Maybe 3 pages was a bit of an overcommitment (it took me 45 minutes each day!), but at least I can do a page. Can I commit to keeping my home spotless? Probably not, but I can keep up with the "stuff" daily instead of every other day.

Our resolutions stem from the desire to be true to ourselves. I am a more loving, compassionate person when I journal and give myself that time to actually think and care about how I feel. I am more centered when everything is clean and where it is supposed to be. So I will be thinking about these things over the next month and make mid-year resolutions, because they represent who I am, even if I'm not quite there yet.

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